Drifting Thoughts 03

I'm currently in an insecurity funk, blogging-wise. It all started last month when I was searching for a blog from a current student in the high school where I spent the last of my "boyhood days" and the beginning of my "manhood years," as I sung its song back then. Now it's a gender-sensitive "childhood days" and "youthful years" due to a shift into co-education two years, mere two years, after I graduated. Indeed within that year, my school underwent even more changes like a move into a new campus and the return of a well-respected principal. I would've thrived in those changing times, but unfortunately for me, I was in Manila by then, so I can only monitor the issues and milestones at a distance. Ever since I started blogging, I knew that the next best thing from being there is to read about the perspective of someone in there, a high school student like I was before. I was specifically looking for their opinions and pictures on a real gritty competition for my own blog entry that I hope would give my high school justice amidst the hyped competition my other alma mater had recently figured in (the plan is shelved for now, partly because I found no pics, partly because of that typhoon again) . In my search I found this, which opened me up to a blogging network of sorts of students in that school (where this one, by the way, rocks and has potential to rock even harder when she grows up). They, in turn, appear to be fans of this Manila-based high school blogger, who I think had fared well in Pinoy Top Blogs. This is where my insecurity surfaces: why do these kids' blogs, judging from the comments and hits they receive, appear to be more prominent than mine? Well, a quick answer would be because they have a readily available audience: classmates. And from these classmates the network would easily spread to their friends, then friends of friends and so on and so forth. As for me, I started blogging more than one year after graduating, enough time for contact with college friends to diminish significantly. Ironically, one of the purposes of this blog is to let these friends know what's up with my life and allow them a peek into other facets of my self that they failed to see in that introverted fellow they knew back then. Sigh. Officemates? No, I'd rather not let them know of this blog, just in case, if you know what I mean. That's why I would never mention my company, or my officemates' names here. Perhaps when I'm in another job, I'd mention them. Family? Same reason.

Another reason for diminished hits in this blog would be my infrequent posting. Like a former senate president, I may say "quality over quantity," but as with that legislator, I am not excused with this pathetic attempt to gloss over the preoccupation of probing other people's blogs instead of writing my own. Instead I should admit that inertia has me fixed on the blog-reading and an external force should act upon me to make me write. Well, I think this insecurity funk has nudged me somewhat.

I shall soldier on my blogging, slowly but surely. In fact I'm brewing an entry of apocalyptic proportions. No, it's not the third part of my Milenyo series although that one's also in the assembly line (attributing that typhoon to the Apocalypse is so pathetically naive. Bato-bato sa langit ang tamaan 'wag magalit, baka yang ibato sa'yo pang-Apokalipsis na nga). It's supposed to be my Halloween entry but it's also related to the winter solstice, so the delay may be justified.

-oOo-

Last month, the world was in furor over the nuclear testing of North Korea. But underneath the crazy hair, this Dear Leader guy sure had some crazier wisdom in timing his latest belligerent act as the last among those of his co-"Axis of Evil", somewhat recognizing that the nation who had the biggest axe to grind against them would be too busy wielding its big stick against the other two to use it against him. That's why, barely a month afterwards, the noise died down--a record time for a news event like this. This is good though, the world doesn't need another war, especially not in the neighborhood at this time of the year.

In hindsight, I remember the anecdote our Israeli guest trainer shared last month about his stint in South Korea. He was amazed at how seriously the people there took their preparations for war. He said there were frequent reminders over a PA system on what to do in case of attack, presumably from the North. In his country, he compares, they may discuss it now and then, but never in a frequency and scale of that magnitude. It may be a cultural difference, but given his country's past and recent experience, we tended to agree that indeed it was a curious paranoid behavior.

Two days later the test happened.

-oOo-

Sanamagan! Manong Max is now gone! Indeed, as someone had said, he has left a void difficult to fill.

I shall write about him and another Philippine Star great, the late Teddy Benigno in another entry. This Drifting Thoughts entry is not worthy to bear tribute to them.

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How to Appeal for Generosity a.k.a. Effective Begging

This was supposed to be posted in late September, but Typhoon Milenyo got in the way.

It was one of those usual rides to work. The jeepney I was riding on readied itself for the last kilometer of its route towards Guadalupe. With our jeepney joining other jeepneys from different routes all going to Guadalupe, traffic slowed. I decided to close my eyes in my vain attempt to take a nap in a moving vehicle. It was at that point between wakefulness and sleep that a skinny little boy dressed in sandos and shorts and carrying empty cans of powdered milk clambered up our slow-moving jeepney. The barker at the back knew of the young one's intentions but was taken by surprise. He belatedly extended his legs to bar the kid's entry, but the seasoned street urchin merely slithered past him. Without missing a beat, the boy immediately started distributing envelopes to us, passengers, in a fast and efficient manner. Written on them were "maawa na po kayo (please have pity)..." and other possibly heartrending cliches that I did not bother reading anymore. I suddenly remembered that we were in the -ber months and the period of gift-giving was near. Some of the passengers were amused by this boy's antics while others, including the barker, were not. I, on the other hand, resumed (pretended) dozing off. The kid sat at the back of the jeepney, facing away from us, and played random beats (noise) with his cans while waiting, not eagerly, for our generosity. I gave him nothing, and I guess the others also gave little since as he stepped off he muttered, in a nonchalant (rather than angry or angsty) tone, "mamatay sana kayo (may you all die)."

When the boy was gone, one passenger remarked that the kid didn't seem to really need the money. Another agreed and scoffed at the "death curse" as a sign of haughtiness. The barker pointed out that, with half the effort, the little bastard could potentially earn more money out of the passengers than what he could collect as fare. Others assumed that the child was neglected by the parents. I thought that the parents might have been the one who taught the kid to beg, or he was merely working for a begging syndicate, hence the disinterested attitude. If this was so, they trained their pupil awfully bad.

Actually, before this incident pushed me to write, I've been thinking about an article on this topic ever since I encountered those Red Cross people at the MRT. It reminded me of the fund-raising activities I once did in college. Yes, I've done some begging before--contributing to a large-scale, institutionalized and organized effort at that, so I know what I'm talking about. In private conversations with project colleagues, I didn't hesitate it to call it as such. In public, however, prudence dictated that use euphemisms like "asking for a little help and contribution" ("soliciting" is not a euphemism anymore).

Before proceeding, I would commend you, potential beggar of a reader, for choosing this non-threatening way to acquire things. I praise you for shunning the absolutely abominable resort to violence. In violence, you expect to be feared, but there will be some who will never be afraid of you. They will seek not just justice but revenge. Indeed, your use of force will only return to you.

Moving on, I present the following tips under a working paradigm: generosity, like respect, has to be earned. In today's trying times, people will not easily depart from money they worked hard for. It follows then that even begging entails toiling and shedding of blood, sweat and tears.

Without further ado, behold the Tips:

1. Have a purpose, a goal. Make it specific. What is it that you really want? How much does it cost? Money is merely a tool to attain that goal. Woe to you if you beg for money when you don't even know where to spend it. Nobody wants to help a drifter drift along. (That's why I have this blog as my cry for help for someone to get me out of this drifting in life, and as a way to help myself write my way out of it.)

2. Be mindful of the target audience. Make sure they have what you are asking. Make sure you appeal to their sensibilities. How would you communicate your message across? Would a business-like manner work? Or perhaps a dramatic guilt-trip approach? By the way, I find it best to ask from the middle class and up since they have the capacity to give and give big. Also, it's better to be all business about it. A guilt trip will not only make anyone feel bad, it's also over-used. Look: how would you put a price on that guilt or whatever emotion you feel? Business, on the other hand, is all about price and quantity.

3. Behave with dignity. Isn't it horrible to see a filthy, fly-infested beggar sulking under the lamppost? Wouldn't you like to just look away instead? How would you then get what you are asking for, if they wouldn't even come near you? Even desperation might turn others off. Just to make it clear, their dignity is still there, it's just that they refuse to show it. It would be fortunate if a blessed soul would make them recognize that dignity and give them hope, but most probably they will just be ignored or worse, mistreated. It is usually up to them to help themselves. Dress up, look clean (no jewelry, obviously). Remember #2, your appearance should appeal to the target audience. Look and act like a human being and others will treat you as one.

4. People give in many ways; receive in many ways. Beggars can't be choosers, it has been said. If you ask for money, prepare to receive money in the form of cash, cheque, transfer, etc. Although tips #1 and #2 would most likely let you get what you are asking for, take whatever they offer especially if given in good faith. They are earnest in their generosity; it's just that they can't give exactly what you are asking for right then and there.

5. There is one irony with begging: it is always better to do it for the benefit of others, an organization, or a project, rather than oneself. The selflessness, the relevance and the cause of that project or organization makes begging a noble activity worthy of support. People might say, here is an established organization that has the means, or at least the potential to be of great service. All it is asking from them is a little help. Most probably, they'll give.

At this point I invite you to transcend begging as means of acquisition. If you have something of value that you can exchange for something you need or want, well then, now we're talking business!

-oOo-

"Mamatay sana kayo..." Of course, boy, we will all die sooner or later. But as I went on with my daily routine, the words rang in my head: while riding the elevator, mamatay sana kayo; while reading a newspaper article about beggars, mamatay sana kayo; while fighting off boredom, mamatay sana kayo; onboard a speeding jeepney on the way home, mamatay sana kayo....

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